Battling #SwampCrotch: Menstrual Confessions + Muffin Mist Review

 Whether you are using cloth menstrual pads, tampons, disposable pads or a cup, you are probably going to experience #swampcrotch at some point. Men probably don’t experience this as often as women, but let’s not discount the fact that some men have to tuck and roll for running and bicycling, and that can cause some #swampcrotch or #swampjunk too.

Jaime Grayson of The Baby Guy NYC, coined the term #swampass in reference to that feeling of your butt getting sweaty and hot from sitting too long, or for babies, from sitting in a carrier or stroller too long. Babies have it harder sometimes because they have diapers on, and that just makes it all the more swampy. Jaime doesn’t deal with #swampcrotch on a monthly basis though like the majority of women, so I, Jayne, coined the #swampcrotch in reference to that feeling when your body heat just radiates in the nether regions during that time of the month when your crotch has extra protection going on, and air flow isn’t plentiful.

You’re going to be lying if you’re a regularly menstruating or were a regularly menstruating woman who has no idea what #swampcrotch is.  Before you found the menstrual cup or tampons, or even while using those devices, you can relate to #swampcrotch. The hormonal changes, the temperature changes, the environmental factors, and even global warming can attribute to every woman at least experiencing #swampcrotch. Just think about it real hard, you’ll remember a time when it was a real feeling, and now that you have a name for it, you’ll always be aware of the mighty swamp feeling.

How do you control that feeling though? How do you cool down the nether regions? I am going to get very personal right now, and talk to you about some things I have done to try and prevent #swampcrotch. I have been aware of the annoying feeling of being extra warm during my menstrual time of the month. I was always self conscious that if someone had a heat sensing camera, the jig would be up and everyone would know. Reality is, nobody knows but you, but you are enough to not be comfortable. So what do you do aside from standing in front of an air conditioner, legs spread eagle, hoping air flow would cool you down through the layers of pants, underwear, and menstrual protection?

I started my journey because I was reading in a Home Birth forum about getting your “birth kit” ready. Two big items on the list were post-partum pads and perineum spray. These items are easy to make using store bought ingredients, and often times are provided by hospitals and birth centers for out the home births. I wasn’t planning on having a baby anytime soon, but the information was something I wanted to keep locked away. The I learned the purpose of those items at relieving swelling and discomfort from the birth of a child and thought maybe it could also help discomfort during #swampcrotch times of the month.

The thing that peaked my interest most was that many of the home made pad recipes required freezing of the pad. So I thought it would just be easier to throw my pads in the freezer, that should help with #swampcrotch. Nope.

I didn’t want to create the mixture that was recommended because it was designed for postpartum and that wasn’t me, so I decided to just add some water and freeze them on the pad. Nope, that just made for a cool crotch until everything melted and it became a cold sopping mess until it warmed up and became an even swampier crotch feeling that didn’t catch all of your menstrual cycle because it was already sopping wet from the once frozen water.

I called it quits after trying those two methods because I was determined in my head that the spray recipe was only designed for women healing after a birth and that it would be pointless for me to purchase the ingredients to make it. So I went on my way and decided to switch to cloth menstrual pads to see if that helped by removing the plastic layer from the equation. Honestly, pads are pads, and they work because they protect and soak up all the flow. So they aren’t necessarily breathable.

I eventually discovered Muffin Mist. Taylor’s Pure and Natural makes a women’s cycle time product line, and they are cleverly named Punani Paste, Muffin Mist and Woo Woo Wash. I won Muffin Mist in a contest, which was good because I had my concerns about if the investment was worth it. I ended up purchased Punani Paste and Woo Woo Wash because if I was going to try one product, I might as well try all three. It has proven to be useful to have all three on hand.

Muffin Mist came into my life during the 3rd cycle of my period in which I was using exclusively cloth pads. I had used cloth pads a few years back, moved into a shared washing unit apartment and called in quits, and here I am back to trying it again this year because the cost of the disposable products I liked were adding up and I didn’t like how I was continually having rashes during a specific time of the month. So I switched to only use cloth pads, and its changed my life and my skin.

When muffin mist arrived, it was right before I left for a trip, so I threw it in my suitcase and didn’t think anything of it. 2 days into the trip, I started my cycle, and since I was traveling, I didn’t have my normal Bidet to use to feel fresh. So I remembered Malena’s (co-owner of Taylors Pure and Natural) periscope a few weeks before where she said she used muffin mist to clean up during her cycle sometimes. So I used a little bit of mist and some toilet paper and it helped me feel a little fresher. During the next change, I actually sprayed the muffin mist directly on the cloth pad before snapping it into place. The witch-hazel in the mixture brings out the tingling sensation that soothes and I feel, lowers the temperature of the swamp situation that is often felt during cycle time.

Muffin Mist is great for freshening up down there when you’re not menstruating too, because sometimes its hot and swampy outside, and your nether regions start to feel all hot and swampy inside under all the layers of clothes. I found that spraying muffin mist on a cloth pad and putting it in the freezer wrapped in foil also can help keep it cool, but its not necessary because its not the temperature that is helping prevent #swampcrotch, its the ingredients of magic.

Taylor’s uses all natural ingredients, derived from mother nature, and has produced muffin mist in different scents, and unscented for the sensitive skinned. I am super sensitive, and have found that the Lavender one works great on my Muffin during the cycle time and even when I just feel swampy.

Because the bottle is in spray form, and is not stored in plastic (although is does have a plastic spray component), you don’t have to worry about leaching and you can share it with friends. I shared Muffin Mist with some friends when they were over and everyone seemed to love it, especially when I shared how it cures #swampcrotch. Everyone giggles at swamp crotch, but its a real thing, and everyone admitted they had that feeling sometimes.

One tip- derived from real life learning experience- Muffin Mist or Witch Hazel of any kind, never-ever-ever goes internally. One of my girlfriends decided to spray her tampon with muffin mist before inserting, and there were some screams from the bathroom. Luckily I have a bidet in my bathroom, and we had Woo Woo Wash on hand to help her balance out internally. Woo Woo Wash is gentle enough for a little bit of internal cleansing. She luckily survived, but now we all know, Muffin Mist if for your Muffin, not for your internal caverns.

I have a small sample of Punani Paste which I use before and after waxing my Punani/Muffin region, but the majority of my container that was purchased was handed to a friend to use with her husband. So far, she has said it’s worked great as internal lubricant for sex. I didn’t necessarily tell her that Punani Paste was for anything but Lube, because honestly, I just wanted to see someone use it for that exclusively. I use Punani Paste to give a skin barrier for waxing, which helps makes waxing easier. My friend uses it often as a lubricant for post baby sex. Its a dual use product! I have even heard it has been used as chapstick. I just can’t try and use the same product on two very different sets of lips though. So I won’t be trying that.

I haven’t had a chance to use Woo Woo Wash yet for washing my pads. I just know Woo Woo Wash has been used to internal flushing from the Muffin Mist Tampon accident. So I can’t give a review on that yet. Muffin Mist however is the product everyone is going to want to have. As a regularly menstruating woman, I highly recommend Muffin Mist, for the prevention and survival of the dreaded #swampcrotch.

Save yourself from #swampcrotch, use Muffin Mist.

Disclaimer: Muffin Mist was won in a Giveaway with Balm Baby (Taylor’s Pure and Natural) through their Womb Room Periscope Giveaway. Regularly retails for $8.95, and since one cycle has run through half a bottle, I will be purchasing this product often. Punani Paste is $11.99 and Woo Woo Wash is $12.99 and both products were purchasing directly from Taylor’s Pure and Natural Website during a 10% off sale.

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