At 12am this morning, a mandatory shelter in place began within my county and all neighboring county limits. This means that there should not have been traffic, there should not have been lines, and that the streets should have looked empty. That wasn’t actually the case, but it’s only day 1.
Today is also St. Paddy’s Day, and wearing my shirt I bought for this day is the only way I am really going to get to celebrate.
Today was the first real test of my patience, as I work from home, cook and eat all my meals at home and have minimal contact with the outside world. I learned some valuable things about myself:
- I really needed to talk to people to feel connected and not depressed.
- The stress of all the things both personal and professionally really left me feeling overwhelmed and burdened and I couldn’t get out of panic mode.
- Time passes quickly, a lot quicker than when I was in the office.
- I really don’t eat, so maybe that is a good thing.
- The internet is not enough, actual voices definitely are necessary during this time.
- It is difficult to get out of the house because anxiety sets in.
- I really miss my old routine.
- I am over prepared in supplies, under prepared emotionally.
- I can cook and do the dishes if my sanity depends on it.
- Baking isn’t worth it if you’re not going to share your goods.
The additional burden of my car being broken into a week ago and so much of my personal information and all my necessities stolen really puts a damper and added anxiety into my day. Dealing with insurance, and the PTSD flashbacks from the last time I had to deal with them, increased my stress even more. In general, today was just a stressful day.
I am finding that I am driven to be a little more hands on. I didn’t realize how much I relied on outside sources for the simplest things until now. It’s been 6 days since I started working from home, so its not like this is new to me, but being under a mandatory Shelter In Place is a lot different than making the choice to work from home and having the option to go out.
Some bright little nuggets of the day have been the following though:
- I found some more noodles that I like at the store, so luckily they weren’t all sold out. Yeah for gluten free options.
- I had the chance to share a meal with one of my favorite people. My friend and massage therapist Beth and I have changed our normally scheduled Tuesday evening massages into Tuesday evening dinner. We are going to stay connected by having dinner together every Tuesday during the same time we usually would be giving/receiving treatment.
- I realized when time permits, I do have the drive to clean, organize, cook and do other things. So at least I am cooking, and washing dishes and driven to keep things in order. So really, it was exhaustion in the past to be blamed for why I wasn’t getting things cleaned and organized quickly.
- I am willing to bake, because time allows it. I apparently have learned that I don’t like baking under pressure.
The one little thing that I never realized was just how much things like baking really are a social thing. I wanted to bake, I have never really wanted to bake aside for as gifts, but today, I really wanted to bake, and then I realized…. baking meant I would have 24 cupcakes. I don’t know anyone who wants to eat a vegan and gluten free cupcake, and I definitely was not going to eat them all by myself, so that changed my ultimate desire to bake. Darn social distancing.
One major perk of this pandemic though is that my little hobby is booming and I am making lots of money doing that. Money that is really earmarked for a charity I am passionate about, but still, money none the less I am making. For every item I am selling, I making between $3-7 profit, so that is awesome, especially when you’re selling 30 a day.
Meal of the Day: So today I ate only one meal, and it wasn’t the one I actually cooked, but it was good. Time gets lost when you’re working from home. However, I did make the vegan creamy pasta recipe I found on Tasty. However, for dinner, I made some noodles and reheated some leftover Tom Yum soup from a local thai place and made Tom Yum Noodle soup.
Well, I survived the first official day of this little experiment and I am still here, I haven’t lost my marbles yet, but it doesn’t mean I am not close LOL.
The Jayne Project 